Can I just say it is bitter cold out there.
Normally, I'd snug in my underground home right now, but due to Isolde, the Trith and other baddies, that's not possible right now. It sure would be nice, though. Griselda and Esther have been very kind in allowing me to bunk down at Merrihaven, but the chill that runs through the house makes my teeth chatter.
Today, I bring to you, my Gammie's Winter Ghoulash.
It is perfect for when old man winter gets ornery and decides to dump mounds of snow on your house and you can't get out. This recipe will stick to your ribs and keep you alive till spring.
Gammie was one of my favorite people. The stories she'd tell would either make your toes curl with fright or your belly hurt from laughter. She taught me this recipe as a young troll and I am thankful, because
it has seen me through many long winters.
You will need to take a trip to Grimhold Marketplace for most of the ingredients. Let's get cooking.
Gammie's Winter Ghoulash
(Ghoulash is definitely spelled right and you'll see why below.)
Remember the onions we used in our skunk cake? Well, you're going to need another three.
Our family are fond of slimed onions. Gammie loved them especially.
Three slimy onions. Make sure there is a good coating of slime on all three onions.
Two knobs of garlic. That's right. Throw them both in. No mincing or cloves needed.
A handful of salt
A handful of pepper. (If you can't take spicy foods, you might want to go easy on the pepper.)
Tomatoes. We're going to need two different forms of tomato. One in a paste and the other in a sauce.
Tomato paste - grab three to four tomatos and give 'em all a good smash. Punch 'em till they are flat, then
drop them in your pot. Remember the dried swamp sludge? You're going to need a bucket full. Dump it in and mix
it all up, until the tomatoes and swamp sludge make a thick paste.
Tomato sauce - You don't want your Ghoulash to dry out, so you're going to want to boil up as many tomatoes as
you can get your hands on. Dump in two buckets of Bog Juice. Most trolls use water, but I think Bog Juice gives
the Ghoulash an extra something special.
One large bag of mushrooms. Look for the white ones. Very important. No substitutions, unless you want to get
sick or worse. Chop these up. Any size will do.
You'll need to visit Aggie at Devilish Delights again. She sells the tastiest chicken feet around.
These are no ordinary chicken feet. As Aggie tells it, a ghoul got stuck in her oven one year and has been there
ever since. It's really strange, but they've become a regular culinary dream team. The chicken feet have a tangy,
dusty, barbeque flavor. The whole family loves them. Throw all the chicken feet into the pot.
Let all the ingredients, so far, simmer for about two hours. This will create a very strong broth.
Two bags of green potatoes. We have garden out back and are able to dig up as many green potatoes as we like.
**Griselda let me know that humans can't and shouldn't eat green potatoes. Humans are to use regular or ripe
Dump potatoes into pot.
Grab a handful of hay or dried grass and wrap it around your lid. Cover your pot with your hay wrapped lid.
The hay or grassy flavor will season your ghoulash. Let simmer for another hour or two.
How to tell if your ghoulash is done; it should have a very earthy smell. I made it at Merrihaven once and it was
described as a garbage smell. I don't see it, but you can decide. Fill your bowl and eat up. It goes with bread,
fresh or stale.
Cover all leftovers well. This recipe is good for about six months. After six months, it starts to turn a bit.
Serves four to six trolls.
That's it, my friends. Gammie's Winter Ghoulash. Until next time. Enjoy.
(This is a fictional recipe. No chickens were harmed in the making
of Gammie's Winter Ghoulash.)
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