There was one fairy that wanted her costume to stand more than anything. Her name was Cookie and she was a cook. Cookie cooked in the Queen's kitchen day in and day out, so she thought it would be a smart (and quite funny) idea to make her costume out of the things she uses to create wonderful meals for the queen and her court.
She tapped her chin, as she did when she was deep in thought, and slowly moved around the kitchen. A spoon might be a good costume, she thought. She held the spoon up and shook her head. No, too small. A sack of potatoes might be just the thing. She dumped all the potatoes onto the floor, ripped a hole in the bottom and sides of the sack and stuck her head and arms through. The word, POTATOES, was painted in red along the side. It fell right to the tops of her feet and tickled her toes when she twirled. It was a good costume, but not funny at all. She pulled it off and threw it in the corner.
She sat down with a huff and and a long sigh, because, you know, fairies are very dramatic. She sat there thinking and staring, staring and thinking, until her head hurt and her eyes started to water from overuse. She went back to her chores determined to find the perfect costume.
On the night of the Halloween Ball, everyone was dressed in their finest, but not too fine. You never wanted to out do the Queen. In fact, there was no out doing her tonight. She was dressed in what could only be described as the most intellectually scientific, studious human student ever. The fairies entering the ball thought their was a human among them. They did what they always do, glared and whispered to one another. The fairies that had already arrived kept doing double takes, sometimes triple or, dare I say, quadruple. Normally, the consequences for staring would be mucking out the stables for a week with one's wings, but not tonight. Tonight the Queen lapped it up, because she had fooled them all.
Cookie stood in the doorway and watched the Queen move around the room. She didn't whisper, glare, stare or do a double take. She knew who the most studious student in the ballroom was. The Queen had come to her that morning and asked about bacon grease and would her hair smell like that forever. Cookie had no idea, but offered to help wash the Queen's head twice a day if needed. It took a team to get her highness' coiffure just right and they were always in need of help. The Queen's inquiry gave Cookie the best costume idea ever. It was brilliant.
She looked down at her costume with pride. It was a full on ham dinner with all the trimmings. She had stuck herself inside the biggest ham in all of Fairy Hollow, then attached potatoes, biscuits, a couple of carrots and an onion to it. It was a bit heavy, but she didn't mind.
What she was most concerned about was the Queen's reaction. Her stomach fluttered. A little voice in her head warned that she might be about to out do Her Most Fairiness. Did she really want to do that? She swallowed hard. It was a scary thing to do, but yes. Mucking out the stables for a week didn't seem like such a bad thing. It's not like she'd never done it before. She stepped over the threshold and sauntered into the room, smiling and nodding. Fairies all around her gasped. Was it admiration or disgust? She couldn't tell and at that moment she didn't care, because several things happened. The ham seemed to be cooking under the bright lights in the ballroom. Little puffs of steam rolled of the gigantic piece of meat. The potatoes pinned to the bottom of her costume banged against her knees every time she moved. There would be black and blues and a whole lot of soreness tomorrow. The onion split and its scent was so strong, she couldn't stop her eyes from watering. The only option was to dump the onion somewhere, but that would ruin her costume and she wasn't about to do that.
Suddenly there came numerous thumps and bumps from outside, then the ground shook, the delicate chandeliers tinkled, and the music skipped a beat. Three male goblins stood in the doorway dressed in suits made of silk with fancy hats in hand. Cookie recognized them right away. There were two abnormally tall goblins and a short, stubby one. The short one was Bonedread and he was the leader. One of the tall goblins was Zeeback, Bonedread's son and the other was Bigrot, a nasty piece of work if there ever was one.
The Queen greeted them, but they ignored her and searched the ballroom. She took off her thick glasses and crossed her arms. The trolls' mouths hung open, then they clapped. The Queen's laughter rang through the ballroom. She waved off their praise and did a little curtsy for effect. She hooked her arm around Bonedread's and turned. That's when the her eyes landed on Cookie's costume. For a split second, her smile faltered. Cookie backed away and tried to disappear behind a sparkly unicorn, but a large walking ham couldn't really disappear, could it? The Queen whispered in Bonedread's ear, but followed the walking ham with her eyes.
Cookie headed for the exit that would take her back to the safety of her kitchen, but quickly discovered that it was blocked by a large, poorly made, donkey. Two pairs of feet shuffled underneath its belly. Bits of cake dropped to the floor. She scooted one way, then other, but there was no getting around the monstrosity. Suddenly, there came a needle-like poke to her shoulder. She stiffened. There was only one person with nails that sharp. The Queen. She slowly turned around, then lowered her gaze. Her royal highness remained silent, but Cookie could feel her studying the costume. She started to do something a fairy simply didn't do and that is to sweat.
The Queen adjusted a carrot, then lifted Cookie's chin. This is it, thought the cook. I'm going to be on muck duty for a month or worse, banned from her kitchen. What would she do then? The Queen could ban her from flying, but not her kitchen. Anything but that. Cookie braved a look. The Queen's face twitched, then her body followed. Cookie shook with fear. Her royal highness was about to explode with anger, but the Queen didn't explode with anger. She exploded with laughter. No one had ever heard her laugh for real before. The sound was strange. The ballroom filled with dramatic gasps and loud whispers.
The Queen grabbed a potato and laughed more. She lifted Cookie's arms and twirled her around. She ungraciously snorted. A few giggles rang out behind her. The goblins stepped up and studied the ham costume.
Cookie did a little jig and they, too, laughed. Troll laughter, times three, was extremely loud. Somewhere a chandelier crashed to the floor. The Queen laughed and laughed. She grabbed at her middle, as tears streamed down her face. Half the ballroom filled with laughter, too. The other half weren't sure if they should.
Cookie danced, twirled, kicked out and flapped her arms. The trolls and Queen laughed harder, then the two tallest goblins did something most unexpected. One troll bit into a biscuit and the other bit the carrot in half. They smiled with delight. The Queen laughed so hard she fell to the floor. The goblins went in for more, but Cookie jumped away. The entire ballroom fell into fits of laughter. It continued on like that for a very long time, but Cookie didn't mind. In fact, the rest of the evening turned out to be joyous and truly magical. She danced the night away with Bonedread and the Queen awarded her with a medal for best, and tastiest, costume.
Cookie went to sleep that night with the smelly ham beside her and a smile on her face.
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