Welcome ladies and gents to the holiday edition of Knoxby's Kuisine.
This recipe comes from my Uncle Dooley and is only made once a year.
Some of the ingredients are hard to come by and others take several
months to ripen.
Uncle Dooley is a kind soul with some quirks. Last winter, Dooley decided
to play Saint Nick in his bright red long underwear. Now, that's not too
bad, but he liked the long underwear so much, he kept it on all year long.
You can imagine the dirt, grime and smell a year later when he came for a visit. Da threw him in the lake, then burned the long underwear.
Let's get cooking. We're going to make the troll's version of a fruitcake.
It's more savory than sweet and perfect for your holiday gathering.
Skunk Cake
Ingredients
* One hollowed out log *
Ten sweet potatoes. Make sure the sweet potatoes are shriveled and just about to rot. This brings out the flavor. You can use fresh sweet potatoes, but your Skunk Cake won't be nearly as tasty.
Two whole salted melons. Salted melon trees are hard to find, but I've gotten lucky at Grimhold Marketplace. See Aggie at the Devilish Delights stall. Tell her I sent you. Be careful, though! Don't look her in the eye. Witches are known for putting many of their customers under a spell. You don't want to be part of her menu.
Fifteen pickled boars feet. Pickled boars' feet can only be purchased at the Quiet Harpy Inn in Busby Stoop. The Harpy makes the best pickled boars' feet. Word of warning: Be respectful. The Harpy does have a
temper.
Five boiled eggs. Make sure you over boil them. You want them to be a bit bouncy.This is gives your Skunk Cake some texture.
Three slimy onions. Make sure there is a good coating of slime on all three onions, otherwise your Skunk Cake will sink in the middle.
Four spoonfuls of Bog Juice. You can get the bog juice from any bog, there's no difference.
Three large handfuls of swamp sludge. Make sure to dry the swamp sludge for, at least, two days. The sludge will become powdery and hold the rest of the ingredients together.
I can almost taste the Skunk Cake. Delicious.
Now, once your swamp sludge is dry, mix all ingredients in a large bowl. The mixture should be thick, but slightly runny. At this point, you can throw in some junberries for a bit of tartness. Pour the mixture into your hollowed out log and spread evenly. Place your log over your fire pit and let bake for about two hours. Let cool.
You can pair your Skunk Cake with a big mug of spiked Bog Ale & one sprig of mint.
That's it, my friends. Uncle Dooley's Holiday Skunk Cake. Until next time. Enjoy.
(This is a fictional recipe. No boars' were harmed in the making of
this Skunk Cake.)
#maxhamby #books #ebooks #series #fiction #read #epub #kindle
#paperback #fantasy #family #friends #blogger #holiday #Christmas
#Thanksgiving
This recipe comes from my Uncle Dooley and is only made once a year.
Some of the ingredients are hard to come by and others take several
months to ripen.
Uncle Dooley is a kind soul with some quirks. Last winter, Dooley decided
to play Saint Nick in his bright red long underwear. Now, that's not too
bad, but he liked the long underwear so much, he kept it on all year long.
You can imagine the dirt, grime and smell a year later when he came for a visit. Da threw him in the lake, then burned the long underwear.
Let's get cooking. We're going to make the troll's version of a fruitcake.
It's more savory than sweet and perfect for your holiday gathering.
Skunk Cake
Ingredients
* One hollowed out log *
Ten sweet potatoes. Make sure the sweet potatoes are shriveled and just about to rot. This brings out the flavor. You can use fresh sweet potatoes, but your Skunk Cake won't be nearly as tasty.
Two whole salted melons. Salted melon trees are hard to find, but I've gotten lucky at Grimhold Marketplace. See Aggie at the Devilish Delights stall. Tell her I sent you. Be careful, though! Don't look her in the eye. Witches are known for putting many of their customers under a spell. You don't want to be part of her menu.
Fifteen pickled boars feet. Pickled boars' feet can only be purchased at the Quiet Harpy Inn in Busby Stoop. The Harpy makes the best pickled boars' feet. Word of warning: Be respectful. The Harpy does have a
temper.
Five boiled eggs. Make sure you over boil them. You want them to be a bit bouncy.This is gives your Skunk Cake some texture.
Three slimy onions. Make sure there is a good coating of slime on all three onions, otherwise your Skunk Cake will sink in the middle.
Four spoonfuls of Bog Juice. You can get the bog juice from any bog, there's no difference.
Three large handfuls of swamp sludge. Make sure to dry the swamp sludge for, at least, two days. The sludge will become powdery and hold the rest of the ingredients together.
I can almost taste the Skunk Cake. Delicious.
Now, once your swamp sludge is dry, mix all ingredients in a large bowl. The mixture should be thick, but slightly runny. At this point, you can throw in some junberries for a bit of tartness. Pour the mixture into your hollowed out log and spread evenly. Place your log over your fire pit and let bake for about two hours. Let cool.
You can pair your Skunk Cake with a big mug of spiked Bog Ale & one sprig of mint.
That's it, my friends. Uncle Dooley's Holiday Skunk Cake. Until next time. Enjoy.
(This is a fictional recipe. No boars' were harmed in the making of
this Skunk Cake.)
#maxhamby #books #ebooks #series #fiction #read #epub #kindle
#paperback #fantasy #family #friends #blogger #holiday #Christmas
#Thanksgiving